What ’s skillful than Halloween ? Five years of Halloween !
Happy Halloween, folks! If you’ve been following BuzzFeed for a while, you know we love to round up the very best Halloween tweets each year. In fact, I’ve done it the last five years!
So, to help us get ready for 2023’s spooky season, here are the most brilliant/hilarious Halloween tweets from 2018–2022:
1.
discontinue using Halloween as an self-justification to clothe slutty - dress slutty every daytime
2.
Heard a rival pappa is be after to hand out king size confect bars for Halloween so now every trick or treater that amount to my home is getting a full wheel of ribs .
3.
Gay Halloween costumes are like " oh this ? I ’m the scarf Mira Sorvino fold at the end of Romy and Michelle "
4.
They were tryna put dude out the bar last night for dressing like Jeffery dahmer , but get along to find out bruh just look like that
5.
pic.twitter.com/PV9Stf6FCc
6.
pic.twitter.com/ub89mWOaCp
7.
Do n’t block to set out weed and television games for John Carpenter tonight
8.
My baby told me a guy cable dressed as Michael Myers for a 3k today . Slow walked the entire prison term and finished dead last . There are few thing I respect more than full loyalty to the bit .
9.
Donating blood to inspirit Halloween tomorrow
10.
This the hardest Halloween costume 😭 I m high as hell look at itpic.twitter.com/prCxtjcR8 tonne
11.
I do n’t have to worry about my small fry TP’ing houses on Halloween because apparently none of them roll in the hay where the spare gyre are .
12.
( Quaker who did n’t get take in on the blair witch project misstep ) ah jeez that ’s awful . tragic . and you found all their footage ? so did they ever like .. explain why they could only bring 3 people in a car that seat 4 or like
13.
My first grader want to go to a haunted house . Not a make-believe one , a real one . " I want to fight a spectre , " were his exact words .
14.
I have it off Halloween in NYC . I just fuck off in a strange gentleman’s gentleman ’s auto in my underwear and we ’re both acting like it ’s a completely normal nighttime .
15.
just overhear someone on the train ask another passenger where they got their elf ear because they the perfect “ sort of weirdly shaped but weirdly realistic span ” and folks , they were not elf ear
16.
pic.twitter.com/YKLBZIjx7Z
17.
Time to get hype up on cold brew and go fight back some bitch at Home Goods for Halloween trash .
18.
Some people go to Vegas to gamble . I regularise my kid a costume from China hope it will get before Halloween .
19.
Halloween in 2021 be like : # SquitGame#Halloweenpic.twitter.com / R3FtUMrCDt
20.
my parent are fighting bc my momma was countenance a cock-a-hoop wanderer live in the kitchen window bc he ’s “ perfect for halloween ” and my dad killed it
21.
I dressed my Canis familiaris up as Trent Crimm , The Independent for Halloween.#TedLasso@TedLassopic.twitter.com/cSuCMEleQc
22.
Every year i m so excited for Allhallows Eve to come in around and then i end up doing nothing
23.
I finally have enough money to get the expensive kit at the top of the Spirit Halloween costume paries , I ’m about to ask an employee to get one of their finest clothing hooks
24.
Just finished putting up my Halloween decorations : pic.twitter.com/4OvDMDXgPc
25.
check your kids halloween candy . my cousin find the blackwash of archduke franz ferdinand in sarajevo by serbian nationalist gavrilo princip inside a snickers barpic.twitter.com/3EgySLKapD
26.
y’ all verify to check your kids candy this halloween . my son came home with lil nas x ’s debut album “ montero ” in his lollipoppic.twitter.com/fDcadSbdBm
27.
the two types of halloween decorations are “ it would be cunning if ghosts wear sneak ” and “ if i knew i could get away with it here ’s how i ’d torture somebody to decease ”
28.
The greatest halloween tweet of all fourth dimension imopic.twitter.com/mIyQoD43z2
29.
“ i do n’t really like halloween ” 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩
30.
If you ever experience like you missed your chance in life , just think that Hocus Pocus , a Halloween picture show , was relinquish in July , no one figure it , and now 20 years later every drag queen regnant is crop like Bette Midler from Labor Day to Thanksgiving Eve . Your prison term is coming darling 🖤
31.
Of course Halloween is shuddery , people rap on your door . It could be anyone
32.
halloween hit unlike as a nestling in canada , frozen half rotted pumpkins and a atomic number 10 winter coat over our costume what the hell were we even doing
33.
" It ’s cool guy , I came up with a name for our Christian Halloween"https://t.co / HdRvUzmd0n
34.
stop asking me what i m a be for halloween i m a be high
35.
live on all out for Halloween 🎃 question what the neck of the woods thinks 😱 🙀 😳 🎃 🎃 🎃 🎃 🎃 pic.twitter.com/6KBCxHmRqy
36.
Everyone spill the beans about how bad social media is for your mental health but what about seeing Christmas decorations in stores before Halloween ?
37.
Guys I ’m too worked up to look for an after icon … look at my Halloween apple pie 👻 🥧 pic.twitter.com/qdazkwRPae
38.(And what the heck…here’s the “after” photo!)
Cracked a piffling but still a beautypic.twitter.com/AhCLupdYus
39.
BREAKING : Copywriter drop dead With " No Tricks , Just Treats " Again This Year For Client ’s Halloween Ad
40.
this twelvemonth for Halloween i am enclothe up as Scout as a Ham from To drink down a Mockingbird and no one can stop mepic.twitter.com/vBLfboSBbu
41.
pic.twitter.com/FeX2V4kZOM
42.
for my scarey Halloween spirit this class I ’m just gon na paint 2020 on my head and call it a 24-hour interval , frankly .
43.
dress up as a covid denier for Halloween is easy . You do n’t even need a mask .
44.
Sure , whoremaster or treating is off the table , but that does n’t think of Halloween is cancel . My youngster and I will he celebrating the old fashioned way , by burning an artisanal pentacle into our base and summon heart from the netherworld
45.
This house in my neighborhood every year nails Halloween decorations.pic.twitter.com/eX19mACqUv
46.
lol not to bend but I can guess what you ’re gon na be for Halloween this yearsingle
47.
cashier : what do u require to be for halloween?me : happycashier : i was talking to the kid behind youme : ok
48.(I know the years start running together at this point, but he has a fly on his hair because he’s dressed up as Mike Pence, who had a fly land on his head during the vice presidential debate.)
My Halloween costume arrived!pic.twitter.com / psobRQ4eqO
49.
my 4 year previous daughter require to dress as a cat for Halloween and I ’m trying to explain to her that Ruth Bader Ginsberg would be better for my Instagram metrics but she ’s acting like the spreadsheet does n’t even matter despite the data being very percipient
50.
A little girlfriend just begin cry at my Halloween palm . I know the emotion I should be feel is n’t pride but 😂 🤣
51.
My mother has truly produced the autumn pumpkin of our era.pic.twitter.com/P6V4ixMRw7
52.
ca n’t believe Hallowe’en finally being on a Sabbatum will consist of me sitting at rest home in a costume alone and probably crying
53.
Why my neighbor already have a giant frame in their front thousand in septemberpic.twitter.com/3SdVnb4G9C
54.
I ’ve adjudicate to give my collection of condiment packets out for Halloween . Polynesian sauce for the best costume .
55.
There ’s a caboodle of lecture about Halloween and Spooky Season but not enough talk about the scariest time of the whole year : swell Who call back wear Shorts When It ’s Cold Out Is A Personality Trait Season .
56.
mayhap if i dress up as Iced coffee for Halloween , she ’ll station me on her story
57.
plz hold on tagging us in your “ Sexy Hamburglar ” halloween costume moving-picture show
58.
When I was in preschool I went to school dressed as a beldam for Halloween , but go frightened of myself at snack fourth dimension and had to be pick up and carry home . This is also my whole personality .
59.
Winona Ryder have the month of October for her iconic Halloween rolespic.twitter.com/WjKszRsUw5
60.
sure Spirit Halloween is only undecided one month out of the whole year but you ca n’t say that they do n’t pick the beneficial month of the year for that sort of business to be overt
61.
everyone ’s like " oh it ’s october 1 , clock time to prep for Allhallows Eve ! " you fools . you rank imbecile . prep sentence is over . you are too late . now it b einsteinium g i n s
62.
me : * tally spider vane down with broomspider : wowme : * put up false wanderer connection ornamentation for Halloweenspider : WOW
63.
my bf is 6’2 i ’m 4’9 . he say he wants us to be sully and mike wazowski for halloween smh where ’s the eject button
64.
Clarence Shepard Day Jr. 87 without sex : went to halloween repulsion nights so I can think back what it ’s like to have a man make me scream again
65.
Ranking the adept Halloween candy:1 . Reese’s2 . Snickers3 . sullen spell kids4 . Twix5 . Milky Way6 . Kit Kat7 . Skittles8 . Starburst9 . Butterfinger10 . Babe Ruth .. 56 . Licorice … 99 . Clorox Bleach …. 176 . confect corn
66.
married woman : how do we explicate Halloween to the kids?Me : they put on a mask and demand strangers for candy . married woman : but we said NEVER accept candy from strangers . Me : we ’ll tell them one twenty-four hours a year it ’s ok . Wife : Me : it ’s like the Purge but for Children .
67.
68.
Yeah I get Halloween is coming up but why would you pay $ 28 to go to a haunt sign when you could log into Canvas and get frightened for costless ?
69.
what the foretoken will be on HalloweenLibra- emotionalAries- high as fuckTaurus- unappreciatedGemini- aloneCancer- ? ? ? ? ? Leo- unlovedVirgo- full of candyScorpio- brokeSagittarius- yesCapricorn- interview ego worthAquarius- workingpisces- busy
70.
What I boughtonline for What actuallyHalloween arrivedpic.twitter.com/jDEqHAPRG5
71.
really frantic about all the dudes who are give out to dress as the turkey for halloween party and not get laid
72.
being a copywriter for a halloween costume company seems like a nerveless spear you just baby-sit around all day assay to get up with name calling like “ merry murder clown ” or “ glasses orphan warlock ” . what a life !
73.
Wife : pick a Halloween pic to watch . Me : Harry Potter . Wife : that ’s not a Halloween film . Me : then why does it have witches?Wife : Me : and spells . Wife : Me : and pilot broomsticks . Wife : pick another movie . Me : fine . Harry Potter figure 2 .
74.
one prison term I was out on Hallowe’en and there was a guy cable wearing a simulated moustache and a priest collar and I asked him " are you someone in exceptional or are you just moustache priest ? " and he read " just mustache priest " and I sound out " coolheaded "
75.
[ Halloween party]Winnie the Pooh : * dressed as Paddington * dude ! 🥺 Paddington : * dress as Winnie * DUDE ! 🥺 🥺 🥺
76.
7 - class - sometime : caper or treat?!Me : It ’s not Halloween . And this is your own house.7 : Are you give me confect or not ?
77.
halloween is my preferred holiday because you may trespass on a stranger ’s property and make a non - negotiable need without getting in trouble
78.
There ’s no age terminus ad quem on trick or treating . you’re able to criticize on my room access with a martini and a smoulder Pall Mall in your old - looking hands and I ’m gon na give you a Snickers . Happy Halloween .
79.
" I do n’t know what you ’re talking about . I ’m clearly Sloth from " The Goonies . " Let go of me!“pic.twitter.com / zYUrH9kO5F
80.
I momently draw a blank it was Halloween so I get a bit of a fright when I proceed to the bathroom at a taphouse and Dracula was bear at the urinal 🧛 🏻 ♂ ️
81.
Just gave my next threshold neighbor a giant bag of confect to dump in my Son trick or treat bucket on Halloween so I can go home after one home .
82.
New Mom : I bought my kids ’ Halloween costumes back in August!Well - seasoned Mom : That ’s coolheaded . I take my small fry shop on October 31st so they ca n’t commute their minds 800 times .
83.
some lady dressed as catwoman is walking around our halloween party just knocking drink off tables
84.
wraith : boo - me : is that reckon to frighten off me?ghost : -mers are pen laws that ensure they ’ll protect their riches until they give out but at the monetary value of all fucking over the next generationsMe : 😮
85.
s / oxygen to the me in the alternate existence where I have halloween plans I go for I look hot
86.
I suppose I ’ll complete my cat lady transformation by giving out cough fall on Halloween .
87.
[ After spending 4 weeks make a costume for Halloween]This is so worth it for a Snickers mini .
88.
Ca n’t believe it ’s 2018 and venturing into a proscribed library still causes an unknown force to extinguish your candelabrum
89.
My toddler is perish to be the Hulk for Halloween and I ’m really proud of him for in conclusion realizing he has anger issues .
90.
me : * skirt up 85 boxes of chocolate*cashier : haha get quick for Halloween are we?me : cashier : me : bank clerk : me : what ?
91.
my neighbour put a " go aside " sign in their window and I ca n’t tell if it ’s a halloween decoration or just a big mood
92.
idea for preoccupied house : dimly lit grocery store sprinkled with people you have n’t verbalise to since high school
93.
Best costume of the night is the 3 twelvemonth old dressed like Sir Francis Bacon who hold on walking up to people and tell “ bacon . ”
94.
i am never fooled by halloween costume . you ’re not really a fire-eater . firemen are n’t real
95.
me watch over everyone have fun and post their Halloween outfits while I ’m at home because I have no friendspic.twitter.com/Ts6nBGyGy7
96.
I come home from body of work last night to my lady friend fudge me dinner party and surprising me with day of the month night 😍 I love halloweenpic.twitter.com/SkzOdVzwQ0
97.
Me : What do you want to be for Halloween?2 - class - sure-enough : Me . No direction . Too shuddery .
98.
" Halloween makes me not wanna have daughters " ya ok I ’m sure your mom ’s really majestic of you throwing your body off the ceiling of a house to land on a board and smash it at a darty , Jake .
99.
tbh the shuddery thing about halloween is the increase in bureau candy
100.
or else of allege “ boo ” for Hallowe’en , say something much much shuddery like commitment or college tuition .
Happy Halloween!!!
