So many instances of what I can only describe as " oblique thievery . "
Hello and welcome to the weekly post where I, Julia, curate the funniest fails from around the internet. Here are this week’s best:
1.This hurt to read:
Turned off my television camera to fart instead of muting my mic , I am distraught the right way now
2.This guy’s misplaced self-confidence:
Thinking about the sentence I turned down a bozo who asked me out and he called me a bad investor because I did n’t “ buy low ” by dating him before he made money or got into shapepic.twitter.com/T1QxtzHmCn
3.I need the thief to be serious:
I trust Allah forgives whoever stole my shoe at the mosque because I won’tpic.twitter.com/hpDtsnaDPW
4.Again, Thief, why?
ppl who host theater company at their own house are so brave bc you could n’t pay me to do that ever again . when i was 20 i threw a political party at my house and someone stole my oeuvre pant . i was working at chick - fil - a. why would you steal chick - fil - a study pants
5.ANOTHER THIEF! But this one I kind of love. Obsessed with the outfit as well as the effort:
This guy kept stealing packages from my friend ’s building so they put up his photograph in the lobby . Then he come back the next day disguised as a witch and tear the photo down 😭 😭 😭 pic.twitter.com/lYoHouQGpI
6.She was right:
If u ever cogitate ur stupid just have sex that one prison term a guy asked me what my “ attachment vogue ” was and I did n’t know what that meant so I say “ PDF if it ’s over email I hate when people mail it as a word doc ”
7.Failing at selfless Christmas shopping. I am feeling this struggle as we speak:
unfortunately when i adjudicate christmas shopping i always terminate up finding thing for myself like little girl i have never needed anything more than i need thispic.twitter.com/tMBxPFP2AX
8.I can only imagine what this child must have thought of her parents when they served her this cake:
My young has confused “ vegan ” with “ cannibal ” and we just discovered this today . A mint of conversations that we had this past workweek are create more horse sense now . Also , her inexorable refusal to eat a slicing of vegan bar .
9.This car break-down:
rip whoever ’s car broke down next to the wagon train station and outcry - out to the person mend it with a rump onpic.twitter.com/QAMjSqk0zj
10.This humbling moment:
have a date tonight and she just posted an ig story ripping shots of whisky
11.Whoever is in charge of sign placement in this store:
do NOT eat this candypic.twitter.com/FiF6r8uAFV
12.This dog’s questionable-looking choice of cuisine:
Peggy regain a hunk of stone - difficult garlic clams in the trash and she ’s been carrying it around for half an hourpic.twitter.com/if1yHobsro
13.To be fair, this song rocks:
thanks spotify neither could my grandmahttps://t.co/W9Nhtzc0RXpic.twitter.com/5Q4yoFzEQ4
14.Children seem to be making verrrryyyyyy humble Christmas lists this year:
part of my 8 yo ’s totally realistic christmas list:1 . a pursuit VR22 . a pursuit VR33 . a motorised dirt bike4 . the young iphone5 . a dinosaur plushie
15.And, finally, The Eye of Christmas. Somebody commented, “He sees you when you’re sleeping,” and I actually did laugh out loud:
Would my children hate mepic.twitter.com/WGkeTSb0gr
