" I understand this was not healthy for me anymore . "
It’s unfortunately a part of life to experience romantic relationships that end up not being right for you. We’ve all been there — including myself. I came across this very relatable question asked on Reddit, “What happened in your relationship that made you realize you deserved better?” and the thread was filled with honest answers from women. Here are some of them.
1.“Might sound shallow but I didn’t get a Valentine’s Day gift or any special treatment at all. It wasn’t so much that I didn’t get a thing — it was that this man would never put in any effort to make me happy. So I was out the next day.”
2.“With my ex, I had to give an ultimatum just to have him do basic things in the relationship like, walk dogs with me without it turning into a screaming match, help with household chores, etc. I had to convince him to try and do things with me, including prioritizing sex.”
— uracil / Slytherin2MySnitch
3.“He kept conveniently forgetting anything I asked or reminded him of.”
4.“I knew when it was magically my fault that he was malnourished because I was too tired to cook, even though I was studying full-time and he was home all day without any work or studies whatsoever.”
— u / Nommert
5.“After an argument, he ghosted me for two weeks for the second time after I told him I wasn’t tolerating this behavior anymore.”
— u / snowy_diao
6.“My ex uninvited me from our family vacation and took his mother instead. He didn’t call or message me the whole time, not even a check-in about our kids. I asked for a divorce the following week and he’s still shocked as to why.”
7.“My ex only wanted to see me twice a week. We lived 15 min from each other, he owned his own house and it was always very calculated. He said running errands as a couple was yucky and any deviation from normal routine freaked him out. Dumped his ass.”
— u / VehicleCertain865
8.“My ex of eight years couldn’t step up when I found out I’d struggle to have kids. I remember the pain of it to this day. He was a wonderful partner, my best friend, there was no one I cared about or loved more in this world but realizing I was carrying this alone was a deal breaker for me.”
" I could n’t appear at him the same knowing how lonely , and empty , he made me feel in those first few weeks . He did n’t have any trace , or any go-ahead to take the lead and have me process the newsworthiness . I was attempt to convince him to abuse up , give me his thought on the situation , and say me what he wanted when I was trying to work on what I wanted from all this and what I ’d lost .
I earn in those moments I deserved well . If I was carrying this weight alone with someone I ’d dedicate this many years of my life to , I might as well be alone until I found someone who would transport it with me and eff what they want so I could tell them if my medical egress will be an issue for their next goals with family making , etc .
We are still friends , and I ’ll probably always love him . But I know that I ’d be happier doing this alone or deserve someone who can support me with it . "
— u / CV2 nm
9.“He and his friend smoked and he was more concerned with her being out in the smoking area alone than me being in the bar alone.”
10.“When I realized I was happier being away from him and dreaded going to see him.”
— atomic number 92 / whereamiwhatrthis
11.“There was a time during the relationship when I was constantly stressed because of him and was crying a lot. I realized this was not healthy for me anymore.”
— uranium / BeautyBabe91
12.“I got praise from work and he couldn’t be happy for me. When I asked him why he said because he doesn’t ‘celebrate mediocrity.'”
13.“We both have jobs, are busy during the weekdays, and have conflicting schedules. The weekends are our only time together and he never shows up early or even sets up a time. He’d just say Saturday and sometimes would show up at 11 p.m. It kind of made me feel like spending time with me was a chore for him.”
— u / Ruess27
14.“He didn’t listen to me during arguments at all. He just spun out and angrily spewed words at me and even at himself. It was only getting worse. I figured it was probably a trauma response and I begged him to get therapy but he refused. He also had weed and alcohol dependency.”
— u / sunbuns
15.“When I fell asleep and felt so anxious not receiving his text.”
— u / BubbleTeaCheesecake6
16.“He would block me on everything out of the blue. We were trying to work through our issues and when I thought that things were going well, I’d find that I’m blocked and unable to message him. He’d unblock me whenever he felt like it and act as if nothing had happened then he’d block me again when he was entertained by his side piece.”
— u / sushixq
