" You ’re beautiful … in your own style . "
There are some things in life that aren’t easily understood as a kid but make perfect sense as an adult. I can now comprehend why my parents told me I couldn’t eat cake for breakfast. Most of the things adults said to me when I was younger, even if I didn’t get it at the time, ended up being logical eventually. But, there are certain things IthoughtI understood the meaning behind, only to realize now I was totally wrong.
When adults would say something like this to me at the time, I would smile and thank them because they were an authority figure and I was supposed to respect my elders, but looking back? What an uncomfortable thing to say to a child. ThisReddit threadfromr/AskRedditwhereu/Significant-Cow-934asked, “What sounded like a compliment when you were young, but you later understood it wasn’t?” proves that I’m far from alone in this experience. Here are some of the most cringeworthy responses:
1.“‘She’s gonna be a heartbreaker when she’s older!’ Just a really weird thing to say to a kid."
2.“You look 18'…when I was 12. As an adult, I realized how creepy that was.”
— uranium / Atlantic_Nikita
" Even as a young teen as a guy , I had a few older women that said , ' The things I ’d do to you if you were sr. ! ' when I was , like , 14–15 or whatever . Realizing later in life-time what these sr. women were implying to me at the time was fantastic . "
— u / lsutigerzfan
3.“I had the opposite experience. I have always looked younger than my age. It was just as creepy. Old men telling me I looked 12 when I was 18 and then proceeding to hit on me.”
— u / ProsciuttoPizza
4.“You’d be so pretty…if you were skinnier.”
— u / GreenDub14
5.“‘You’re so mature for your age’ really meant I was traumatized and too scared to behave like an actual child."
6.“When I was young, someone once told me, ‘You’re so lucky you don’t have to worry about your looks.’ At the time, I thought it was a compliment, but later, I realized they were saying I wasn’t conventionally attractive.”
— u / sk0355
7.“You’re beautiful…in your own way.”
— u / ZobiBakugou
8.“I had an adult tell me, ‘You’ve turned into quite the swan.’ So…they mean I was an ugly duckling before…?”
9.“I wish I had your confidence,' usually said to a bigger person."
— uracil / BlackVelvetx7
10.“You’re such a perfectionist.”
— u / Outside_Performer_66
" Many prison term , citizenry who say that are annoyed because you ’re take too long to do a task or that you take over a group job . Many perfectionists go behind and ' fix ' what other people have done , and that rag them . "
— uranium / sneezhousing
11.“My aunts used to say I had great birthing hips. I was 13.”
12.“You’re smarter than you look.”
— atomic number 92 / Vegetable - Poet6281
13.“People told my mom, ‘Your daughter is so well-behaved!’ No, I was horribly anxious and scared of the consequences if I acted out even slightly. Teaching your kid how to be a good human is one thing, but teaching your kid that you can take anything they love away from them at any time if they make a mistake is something else entirely.”
— atomic number 92 / SalmonOfDoubt9080
14."‘You’ve got an old soul,’ usually meant I was quiet and did what I was told."
— u / the_sand_moose
15."‘You’re too courageous for a girl!’ ‘You should’ve been born a boy!’ It was a long time until I learned how misogynistic and nonsensical they sounded."
16."‘You’re so nice.’ A lot of people consider ‘niceness’ a weakness, something to be suspicious of, or something to take advantage of."
— u / Iblisie
17."‘You are too pretty to act that way!’ I was upset about something and expressing myemotions."
18."‘Wow, you’re very talkative,’ aka how to tell small children to shut up."
— u / HiMaintainceMachine
19.And finally, “Bless your heart.”
