There ’s no come back from that .

1.On brain capacity:

2.On hair:

3.On dinner:

4.On baking bread:

5.On gaming:

6.On dating:

7.On steak:

8.On spectacles:

9.On beauty:

10.On words:

11.On chicken:

12.On boom boom:

13.On talking:

14.On car sales:

15.On World War II:

16.On surgery:

17.On clothes:

18.On Google:

19.On office views:

20.On doing your best:

21.On libraries:

22.On romance:

23.On politics:

24.On extraterrestrials:

25.On transportation:

26.On dolphins:

27.On concessions:

28.On cuisine:

29.On internet arguing:

30.On zombies:

31.On pay:

32.On January:

33.On children:

34.On Texas:

35.On the Earth:

36.On corn:

37.On “manning up”:

38.On eggs:

39.On IQ:

40.On vacationing:

41.On pointlessness:

42.On spelling:

43.On dogs:

44.On bathrooms:

45.On the Civil War:

46.On internet commenting:

47.On milk:

48.On “the friend zone”:

49.On the American utopia:

50.On sustenance:

Did you enjoy all those wacky pictures but really wish you could’ve been listening to some cool tunes while reading them? You’re in luck, my friend. Check out thisplaylistof my favorite songs I listened to in 2023. Bless!

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"So trans people should just be allowed to murder whoever they want?" "your brain could revolve inside a peanut shell for a thousand years without touching the sides"

"The skin on the palm of your hand does not have the ability to grow hair; what part of your body do you wish had this type of skin?" "Between my eyebrows"; "I'm guessing that 's' isn't needed?"

Lots of takeout fast food on a desk, which has a chunk missing from the side of the top, with comment, "all that food and you decide to eat your desk"

Person posts a photo of a loaf of baked bread that looks extremely dense, saying "This is it lads, the worst loaf of bread I've ever made," with comment, "A toddler with a skateboard could get more air than that"

"Does this game exist?" "Second Life is not a game; it is a multi-user virtual environment; it doesn't have points or scores, it doesn't have winners or losers"; "Oh, it definitely has losers"

Person wants a hookup app with girls who have lower standards and aren't "heavy-set," is told you have to be interesting to attract interesting people; they say they are interesting and are told, "Spoken like the human equivalent to a bowl of bran flakes"

Person posts a photo of sliced steak they cooked "for the first time" that looks raw, with comment, "What did you cook that under, a heated argument?"

Person posts photo of their prescription sunglasses that "are like half an inch thick," and someone comments, "They had to decommission two lighthouses to make those things"

"Has anyone told you how beautiful you are today"; "No"; "Better luck tomorrow"

"'Far right,' another word for anyone that disagrees with me," response: "'Far right' is two words"; "Great come back," response: "Comeback is one word"

Person posts photo of chicken legs they air-fried, with plate propped on their leg and showing their bare dirty foot, and someone responds, "Why are your feet seasoned better than the chicken?"

"Silly but legit exercise question: How come my watch doesn't say 'it looks like your exercising' when I make boom boom with my partner?" "It doesn't register workouts shorter than 3 minutes"; 'I'll see myself out"

"Another word of advice for those that need it: Writing words on a website is not speaking it is typing; thank you for coming to my Ted Talk"; "You mean your Ted Type?"

Person selling a 2002 Nissan Micra for 1,000 pounds is asked if it's still available; when person says yes, they get "Not surprised" in response

"Germany winning WW2 would've been a massive W for all of humanity"; resposne: "Dipping your balls into liquid nitrogen before tapping them with a croquet mallet would be a massive W for all of humanity"

"im gonna get plastic surgery to look like a porcelain doll"; "why? arent toilets already made out of porcelain?" "shut the hell your mouth"

Person asks if a "women's jumper" is "still avelable," is told yes but they misspelled 'available'; they say, "Not sure why that's an issue" and are told they made an issue out of nothing so they can't buy it, and to "go back to school and learn spelling"

"Google should not be used in school nor taught in school; computers and the internet have ruined kids," "Be a good role model and get off the internet then"

Person posts images of views above clouds with caption "The view from my office," and person responds, "What are you? God's receptionist?"

Lance says, "You did your best and that's all that matters; I'm proud of you boy," response: "If that's his best then"; Lance: "If Lance wanted to hear from an asshole, he would have eaten a can of beans"

Person asks "Are there other visual novels without pictures? Like ones that are just dialogue and narration," and someone responds, "perhaps something at the library can help us"

"The other day I started writing an office romance but quickly remembered that I have no idea what working in an office is like"; "As opposed to your vast personal expertise in romance?" And person responds with a giant sad emoji

"On a serious note what are people's opinions here? I haven't followed politics for a while now"; "you're barely old enough to follow politics kid"; "and you're way too old to be taking shirtless mirror selfies but hey here we are"

"Woman shouldn't get this angry from a man"; "You type like an alien who has discovered human language and is trying to use it for the first time"

"My favorite mode of transportation is tap dancing': "Get on a tractor for once in your life you sickening theater person"

"People say dolphins are smart but there not smart enough to not be Shty grey rubber tubes flappin about in the gotdamn ocean"; "you are the piss lord of shit mountain … hefting turds down the mountainside"

Person posts tubs of fried chicken and French fries with caption, "If they sold these in theaters instead of popcorn I'd be happy"; response: "you will never financially recover after buying chicken wings from the movie theater"

Person posts photo of fries with very green peas and a stick of breaded meat or fish with caption, "British cuisine, best in the world," and someone responds, "The peas look like someone melted the toy soldiers from Toy Story"

Someone says "Screaming about it on the internet to people that generally share your values never fixed anything," and someone replies "it's written text, you can read it however you like; for example, I read your comment in Goofy's voice"

Someone says something confusing ("How do thirst walk the thirst drink eat zombie the food, having problems reloading the zombie after dark") and gets told to check the battery in their carbon monoxide detector

Person looking for a babysitter, paying $125/week for 5 am to 6 pm; response: "Ah okay, so 52 cents/hour; good luck!"

Someone says "just realized january is spelled the same forwards and backwards" and gets told, "You can tell by a mf tweets the teacher used to hand back test test folded up in school"

In response to handwritten sign "If your child puts his/her hand in the topping you have to pay for the entire container," person responds, "The ones offended by the sign are the type of parents who have kids that smell like hot dog water"

"They built Texas with infrastructure that's like 'let's hope it doesn't rain, snow, hail, get windy, stormy," and other weather; someone responds, "L opinion go back to New Hampshire," and "how many cigarettes did ur parents force you to eat?"

Person posts photo of the sky over the sea with text "No curve here" and "Can we agree on that?" on the horizon; someone responds, "I love flat earthers because they remind me that there are always people even more disappointing than me"

"Loser, I feel like I could throw corn kernels on the ground in front of you and you'd peck them up like a chicken"; "What the fuck"

"Need to fucking grow a pair, women don't even know what they bloody want half the time — don't let them dictate what you can do!" Response: "There's a reason why you post in r/divorce" and "Oof"

"I like when you see people in the grocery store buying eggs because they always pick up the carton and open it like it's a metal briefcase full of cash in a drug deal"; response: "People are checking to see if any of the eggs are cracked you walnut"

"Your iq is zero" and "and i have at least 500 times bigger iq than u"; response: "Well, I might not be extremely wise, but at least I know that 0 x 500 is still 0"

"I'll be 40, no kids, and people will say 'i'm sorry for you' and I'll be like how was the Wiggles reunion tour, I went to Italy"; "It's sad to think oneself more important than progeny"; "so the concert wasn't as good as you thought it would be, huh"

"Not even gonna bother with watching these pointless videos, the things people will do for attention," "Yeah, some people online are just constantly seeking attention—this one dude I met online even comments on videos he didn't even watch"

"I think of my paycheque like mana in a videogame," someone corrects them to "paycheck," they say "Oh sorry, I live in Canada where we spell things correctly," and person responds, "What a polite way to say fuck you"

Photo of a small white dog with golden ears and caption, "Mom's potato staring at me across the room," response: "This dog looks exactly like what Renaissance era painters thought dogs looked like"

Photo of an "All genders" bathroom sign with caption, "Kansas City airport! Hell no, I will not fly into this airport"; response: "Wait till she hears how the bathrooms on the plane work"

"The Civil War wasn't about slavery until the Union started losing; many Southern generals couldn't have cared less about slavery"; "So you have a degree in US history during that time? Because I do and that's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard"

"I can't think of anything I give a fuck less about," "And yet you wasted a minute writing this comment and another reading my reply"; response: "Sometimes it takes a minute or two to get a booger out of my nose, don't act like ur better than a booger"

"Milk always goes good with pizza or spaghetti and meatballs," response: "I upvoted you because of the context of this post, but know that you do not deserve to be considered a human being"

"Girls will pound themselves silly with a piece of plastic while leaving a good man that would love them till end of time in the friend zone," "Tony if someone leaves you for a piece of plastic, it's not the piece of plastic"

"America isn't perfect, but it's closer than any other society has been; it's easily the most free country to ever exist, and the leader in healthcare and every other industry"; "There's a tree working hard to make oxygen for you, fucking apologize to it"

"Who cares, USA is still the best country on earth, you sad Europeans will never know what it's like to own land or a full-size truck, to grow your own food"; response is a photo of  plants and "can't imagine what it's like to grow my own food"