" The day my dad ’s ashes were delivered , he came home and assure me I was ruining his life because I was ' sad all the time . ' "
Recently,u/greenonion04asked the people ofr/AskWomen, “Divorced women of Reddit, when did you realise your marriage was officially over?”. So, we thought we’d share some of the most-upvoted replies:
1.“I had gone to the gym in our apartment and ran on the treadmill for 20 minutes.”
" I had never been capable to do that before ( I had undiagnosed asthma at the clip so that ’s why run was so arduous ) . I arrive home and was so proud of myself and say him .
He rolled his eye and said running for 20 minutes is n’t hard . That was it . That was the second I was done . I put up with so much and supported him in so many way but he could n’t even say good job to me over something so small . It was like the veil face-lift and I could see everything . I called a attorney the next day . "
— u / dont_blink_angels
2.“My ex-husband begged me to stay with him after cheating.”
" I went through some therapy and decide to attempt to work through it .
He told me that if I ever cheated on him he would leave me . I was done as presently as the sentence left his mouth . "
— u / chighland
3.“I told my husband point blank ‘I’m not happy.'”
" He say ' If you ’re unhappy you ’re devoid to bequeath . '
And I did . "
— u / thaiangel9008
4.“I realised it was over when I had completely switched off, and whatever he said or did made no difference to how I felt.”
" I know I was n’t coming back . "
— uracil / ellepre
5.“I turned him down and he asked me: ‘What do you even do for me? What do you do for our child?'”.
" I name everything , I do n’t even call up his response . I remember the room he asked me , the fashion he could n’t see how firmly I was bring for our household , and it break me . It ’s been over a yr and it still pee me so tempestuous . I always feel like no matter what , I was n’t doing enough . "
— atomic number 92 / gamerladyM ·
6.“When I realised I was in love with his potential and who he could be.”
" Sadly his natural process did n’t comply his word and I could n’t do it any longer . 14 years we were together . "
— edit user
7.“I was ill with a condition that affected my vision, and I had to wear an eye patch.”
" Per doctor ’s orders , I needed to rest . I was also frightened about my health and doing badly . However , my hubby was used to me taking care of everything or at least holding his mitt through everything . So when he break away his glasses at work , he needed me to go with him to the glasses store 30 minutes away to get a fresh duo , because he could n’t handle this transaction on his own .
It was showery , cold , and I had zero depth perception . We had to wait for his glasses to be ready , so he made me walk around outside with him on the slippy sidewalks when I could n’t see well . I was miserable and frigid . That ’s when I knew he was never exit to determine up . "
— u / weenertron
8.“When I would take extra shifts at work so I wouldn’t have to go home and deal with him.”
" The tension in our house from all the thing we did n’t cognize how to say was unbearable . "
— atomic number 92 / coccopuffs606
" I would sit in my car in my work parking lot for almost an hour before channelise home . "
— uranium / yacht_clubbing_seals ·
9.“When he finally started doing all the things I had been asking him to do (date nights, chores list, caring more about the bills, and a more enjoyable bedroom situation) and I didn’t care anymore.”
— u / NameStormsAfter19
10.“It was right after my dad died.”
" The day my dad ’s ash were delivered , he came home and told me I was ruin his life because I was ' sad all the sentence . ' Then , during my pop ’s funeral , he said he was only there because he had to be and that he would much rather be somewhere else .
He spent the dark after the funeral measure hop with a womanhood he ’d had a compaction on , leave me at home alone . A few day subsequently , he said that I had to let him sleep with other people or else he was go to file for divorce . So , I filed rather . Easiest decision of my life sentence . "
— u / saraisha000000
11.“I moved into the guest room after more than a year of zero intimacy.”
" Three calendar month later I asked him why he ’s never involve about me moving into the client room or even essay to hash out our wedlock . He just got frustrated that I even brought it up . I responded by say I ’d never bring it up again and hired a divorce lawyer the next day . Easiest decisiveness I ’ve ever made , but only after many days of defeat , impression , and self - incertitude . 10/10 , would do again . My only regret is not dissociate earlier . "
— u / MediocreResponse
12.“He left the state to attend a funeral. I had encouraged him to go since I knew it was important to him, even though we had two toddlers and I ran a small (but very, very busy and time-consuming business).”
" I knew it would be difficult to cover everything without him there , but I also know it was important to him to be there .
Except it was n’t difficult . My life was so much easy for those four days . The kids and I were so much happier . The house stayed clean . We did n’t have to walk on shell test to guess his moods . I was able-bodied to juggle taking care of the kids and my business all by myself easily . We even did a ton of art and crafts projects .
I realised my lifespan was easier and better without him in it . I had been contemplate divorcement for a long time , but I figured it would be too unmanageable to deal everything on my own . When I realised that the kids and I were so much happier and the theatre upkeep was so much easy and handling my business was so much simpler ( even with the constant distraction and reduce amount of fourth dimension I could work each daylight ) , I knew I could do it . "
— u / originalhoney
13.“When his girlfriend got pregnant.”
" We did not have an open marriage . Did not know about the girl . This was during the fourth dimension our one - year - onetime girl was recovering from a major surgery . dork . "
— u / Kiminwi4233
14.“He used to say ‘I can’t do this anymore’ all the time when things didn’t go his way.”
" One Clarence Shepard Day Jr. I tell apart him how dreaded that made me feel . The next time he told me he could n’t ' do this anymore ' , I state him I could n’t do it anymore , either . And that was the beginning of the oddment . I remember we both kind of give way up trying .
We ’re still cultivate through the unconscious process . It fellate . He ’s a terrific guy rope in many ways . And a wonderful dad . "
— u / Kind_Situation7569
15.“He kept finding jobs that required him to be away from the house during the day or for long periods at a time.”
" He was active duty war machine whenever we got married and once he beget out he find an overnight job where I did n’t see him , then worked on the railroad where I did n’t see him , did private contracting oversea , and the final straw was beget an nightlong road construction job across the country . "
— uracil / ThatEmoNumbersNerd
16.“When I stopped trying to talk to him about why I wasn’t happy. I’d exhausted myself to the point of not caring.”
— uranium / meowberrysundae
17.“When he chose to stay at home, waiting for a potential phone call (that his business partner could have answered) rather than going on vacation with me.”
" It would have been our first vacation in five years . It on the spur of the moment became clear that he no longer loved me , and only care about his business .
I proceed on holiday alone , had a blast , and then come back and left him . No regrets . "
— uracil / OkFaithlessness8942
18.“When he refused to stay by my side at the hospital after major surgery and a cancer diagnosis.”
— uracil / CrochetAndKittens
19.“I was 8.5 months pregnant and had told him my blood pressure was high and I was at risk of pre-eclampsia (again) and I needed him to please not do anything to upset me or stress me for the remainder of the pregnancy.”
" I say him my life was at risk and the baby ’s life was at risk . He said he understood .
He steal money from my coin bank account three twenty-four hour period later . When I asked what he had done with my money , his words were verbatim : ' Would n’t you wish to roll in the hay . ' He ’d been direful to me the entire pregnancy , but I thought learning about my actual delicate term would make him block up . It did n’t .
I actualize this was his way of telling me he did not care if I was alive or dead , did n’t care if the baby was animated or dead . I realised that if a humankind treat you this way when you ’re 8.5 months pregnant with his child , this never , ever terminate .
I asked for a divorce when the babe was one month old . Ten year and nine days ago today . "
— u / Ms_Rarity
20.“When he told me during an argument that my feelings didn’t matter.”
" I tell him how much it suffer me , and instead of apologising , he just said ' I did n’t mean it ' . He was gallant of the fact that in 17 yr , he had never apologised to me . "
— u / tundahouse
21.“At one point, I realised that everything about him was repulsive, especially his smell. My olfactory sense told me that it was over.”
— u / michikokopuffs
22.“When I realised I was a mother rather than a partner.”
" I spend my free prison term cleaning at night when I should ’ve been log Z’s . I kept get to remind him to cleanse his protein pulverization off the rejoinder . I also attempt to teach him how to repel . He ’s someone else ’s job now . "
— uranium / dirtypig796
Shout out tou/greenonion04andr/AskWomenfor having this discussion.
take note : compliance have been edited for length and/or clearness .
Thumbnail credit : Nickelodeon / Channel 9 / Getty Images / ABC / Fox
